AXEL (The Beckett Boys, Book Eight) Read online

  “You’re wearing too many clothes,” she pants, digging her fingernails into my shoulders.

  “This isn’t about me,” I murmur against her drenched cunt. “You won the bet, remember?”

  “But I…I want you,” she says, her pelvis pushing toward me. Her head is thrown back, hair mussed, her nipples rock hard. “Inside me. Please. Please, Axel.”

  Fuck I want to so badly, it isn’t funny. But I don’t have any protection on me—didn’t think I’d need any for the family picnic. “No condoms, Kendra,” I say, and I know she can hear the regret in my voice.

  “I…I’m clean,” she whispers, rubbing that gorgeous pussy against my mouth, and I can’t help but lick her swollen clit and savor the way she tastes for me. “You’re the only person I’ve ever been with. And I got on the shot so I can’t get pregnant.”

  “Kendra.” I pull up and look down at her. This is a big thing she’s saying here. I’ve never barebacked a woman before, too afraid of having a child who might end up a bastard like me.

  She curls up and captures my face in her hands. They’re trembling. I can see the raw emotion in her eyes. “Axel. I just, I…” She shrugs, suddenly embarrassed, and shakes her head, her gaze flicking away from mine. “It’s fine. Never mind. Sorry I suggested it—just feeling impulsive.”

  No. Fuck that. I don’t want to lose whatever is happening here between us. I tug my clothes off before I can think. I need to be inside her. Ache for it on a molecular level. Then I kiss her until she’s wanton and pliant below me, her body writhing against me.

  When I slide into her, my bare dick in her pussy, she’s so fucking wet for me, open for me, and I know that I’m experiencing heaven for the first time in my whole damn life. The sensations are so heady that they leave me breathless. “Oh God, Kendra,” I whisper against her lips. “This is…”

  Powerful. Potent.

  “Axel,” she says. “Fuck me. Please.” Her tiny fingers dig into my back, and I oblige, withdrawing and then hammering into her cunt with a ferocity that steals both of our breaths.

  I cling to her like she’s my lifeline, my buoy in turbulent waters. I need Kendra with a desperation that scares the fuck out of me. What’s happening between us is so far beyond physical that I’m lost. But right now, all I can think about is how I want to please her, pleasure her, show her that she’s the most beautiful and desired woman on the planet.

  Kendra begins that low keen that indicates she’s edging close to her orgasm. I angle my cock so it strokes her G-spot, driving into her relentlessly, wanting nothing more than for her to feel good. I’ve never needed anything in my life like I need this.

  When my fingers are between her thighs and I’m rubbing her hard bud, she arches against me, and then her wails echo off the stone walls, and I can’t help it, I’m falling right after her, spilling myself into her tight, clenching pussy. Our bodies are locked together, our breaths mingled.

  It takes several long moments before we’re both easing down from our orgasms. I withdraw from her and lie on my side, pulling her into my embrace. We’re both breathless, ragged from the intensity of what just happened.

  “Wow,” she murmurs, and I can’t help but laugh a little at her exclamation.

  “Wow indeed,” I reply, kissing her forehead.

  This woman has wrecked me, and I have a sinking feeling that there’s no going back from her.

  I hand Charles a copy of my business plan, a duplicate of the one I have for myself. “Thanks for meeting with me,” I say, moving toward an empty seat at the long table. We’re in a meeting room in his office building. “I know you’re busy and I don’t want to waste your time, so if you want to open up to the first page, I can show you my forecasted income over the first six months and explain my vision—”

  Charles drops the folder on the table, not bothering to sit down. “Axel.” I can’t read his face, but I can tell that he isn’t the same guy he was when we were having scotch and cigars a few nights ago. This man seems hard, distant. “Sit down.”

  Suddenly I don’t want to. I have a feeling I’m not going to like what he has to say. My stomach is flipping over itself, though I school my face into a neutral expression.

  I spent hours upon hours preparing a business plan for this meeting. I’ve taken it more seriously than anything I’ve ever done in my entire life. And as such, I’m on edge and nervous about how he will receive my idea.

  Doesn’t sound like he’s going to even make it to the first page.

  Disappointment festers in my chest, right beside my old friend, anger. Because of course that’s how this is going. Here I thought I was going to have a fair chance. What a fucking joke.

  Part of me is tempted to tell him that Butch is ready to sell the house, just to get his attention. But I don’t want him to consider my business plan as a bribe for the house, as some sort of bargaining chip. I want my effort to stand on its own merit. Because it’s a solid plan, and I believe I can be successful.

  Charles, however, seems to give no fucks about any of that. He grips the chair in front of him, eyeing me. “Look. I’ll be honest. I didn’t actually think you were going to show up for our meeting prepared.” The words are delivered with heavy irritation, like I’m nothing more than a pebble in his shoe. An annoyance.

  A feeling I’m more than familiar with.

  “Crazy me,” I murmur. “Thinking a business meeting means we’re going to discuss business.”

  Charles gives a quiet laugh and pulls out the seat, sits down, leaning back against the rich fabric as he eyes me. “Axel. Seriously. Did you think I’d be genuinely interested in investing in a low-class tattoo parlor like what you’re proposing? That’s one step above a strip club…at best.”

  My jaw is so tight at the insulting words that I feel like some of my teeth are going to grind clear out of my head. “Then what the fuck am I doing here?” I manage to say.

  “I set this meeting to appease my daughter,” he says easily, as if he doesn’t give two fucks about how insulting this is to me. “It has nothing to do with you. Frankly, I thought you were smart enough to know that. Guess not.”

  Red rage fills my vision. I’m a fucking moron. I can’t believe that for even one second, I thought this man would actually listen to me, respect me. Here I was, believing somehow that Kendra and I were going to have a chance, that Charles would view me as an equal. Yeah, that was never going to happen, and it never will.

  “Tell you what.” Charles turns his copy of the business plan around, unopened, and pushes it across the table toward me. It bumps my folder. “I’ll pay for a class in graphic design for you at a nearby community college.”

  I’m so insulted by that shitty offer that I want to punch him in the face. Hard. It’s only because of Kendra that I gather up the two copies of my business plan and stand. I don’t look at him. Don’t dignify that bullshit with an answer. I just leave the room, leave the building. Dump my plans in the trash can outside.

  Fuck him.

  I need a drink or two. Or twelve. Enough to make me forget about what a fucking stupid man I am, to actually think something like this could happen for me. I’m a joke—no, I’m a punchline. He’ll go back to his rich-fuck friends tonight and laugh over the poor trashy guy he pulled one over on. Cocksucker.

  I get on my motorcycle, rip my tie off, and throw it down on the ground. Then I drive myself to the nearest bar. Time to forget about the shit storm that is my life.

  Kendra

  By the time I’m off work for the evening, I’m starting to worry. Axel was supposed to check in earlier today and let me know how his meeting with Daddy went. But he hasn’t answered any of my texts, and Daddy’s assistant told me an hour ago that my father already went home for the day.

  Should I call Axel? Did it not go well? From what we discussed and what I saw, it looked like he had a solid plan. I can’t imagine that my father didn’t at least give it a decent review. Maybe Axel got nervous and flubbed it up. I’m sure Daddy
would give him another chance to present it, if so.

  I just gotta talk to Axel and find out what happened.

  I start driving toward his place when my phone vibrates. It’s a text from him.

  Shitttty day. At Vinnies getting drinx

  My stomach tightens. Oh, no. Clearly it didn’t go well. Vinnies is a seedy bar in his neighborhood, one my friends and I used to joke about going to if we ever wanted to date a criminal. The memory makes my face burn with shame—I used to joke about people like Axel, not really thinking about what it’s like being in their shoes.

  Well, this is as good a chance as any to put my words to the test. I want to be with him, so I gotta accept who he is. And it seems like he might need to talk, given what a bad day it was for him.

  I navigate to Vinnie’s parking lot and pull in. My car is the only one in the lot—the rest of the vehicles are massive, decked-out motorcycles. I enter the shabby building and blink at the smoke floating in the air. Despite it not being legal to smoke in buildings anymore, this bar still allows it, thumbing its nose at the law.

  I can feel curious glances at me as I scour the room, looking for Axel. The place has mismatched furniture, pockmarked tables and a slab of a bar at the far end. People are laughing and partying it up, and loud rock music blasts through tinny speakers.

  There he is. I spot him on a stool, hunched over, staring down. I take the seat beside him and rest my hand on his upper back. “Hey,” I say, and he turns to look at me. His face is etched in stone, his eyes bloodshot. I can smell the booze pouring off him—he’s clenching a glass of amber liquid. “You okay?” I ask.

  His snort of derision is loud. “Ask your father how I am.”

  My throat tightens. “I’m here and I’m asking you.”

  He sways in his seat as he spins to face me. “He didn’t even listen to me. It was a fucking joke.”

  “Maybe there was just a misunderstanding,” I find myself saying. Surely lines got crossed somehow.

  “Kendra. No misunderstanding.” He takes a deep swig to finish off his drink. “He didn’t think I’d actually show up for the meeting with anything real for him to look over. Shoved the plan back at me without listening and offered to pay for a class at the community college.” Axel lets out a bitter laugh. “Your dad is a real piece of work.”

  Did my father really treat him this way? When I told him about Axel’s idea, he seemed so interested. But why would Axel lie?

  He wouldn’t. The despair coming off him is real. My dad fucked him over. He betrayed me and Axel, made us think that the offer for a meeting was genuine. I’m filled with mortification and anger, emotion sweeping through my bloodstream and making me clench my hands.

  “Let’s get you home,” I murmur.

  Axel waves me off and looks for the bartender. He’s swaying more now. “I am home,” he says in a surly tone. “This is where trash like me belongs, right?”

  Can I blame him for being pissed? I am too. I’m seeing a new side of my father, and I feel ashamed of him. Ashamed to be his daughter.

  “Please?” I ask Axel. “Just…come with me,” I say, reaching over and touching his arm. “This isn’t the way to deal with this.”

  He huffs a hard sigh through his nostrils then gives me a curt nod. I square up the bill with the bartender and manage to get Axel into my car. He’s nearly passed out by the time I get to his driveway, and it takes a couple of hard shakes to wake him up enough to wrangle him into his house.

  Axel flops onto the couch, and then he’s out cold. In sleep, the deep lines etching his face are gone, and he looks innocent, all his anger gone.

  But mine is building, festering in me. I’m so damn mad that I’m almost vibrating with my anger. My father lied to me. Flat-out told me one thing and then did another behind my back. Does he think I’m stupid? That I wasn’t going to find out how he pulled one over on me and Axel?

  I get back into my car, gripping the steering wheel as I drive home. Is this how he runs his business? These aren’t the ethical actions of a man who raised me to be better than this. How well do I even know this man at all, if he can treat me and others this way? Where is the respect for others he ingrained in me?

  I make it home, pull into the driveway, and dart up the stairs. Daddy is sitting in his den, having a scotch.

  “Hi,” he says cheerfully, as if he hasn’t flipped my entire world upside down through his actions. As if I’m stupid and don’t know the machinations he’s done behind my back. I feel sick just looking at him.

  “You are unbelievable,” I spit out. That gets his attention; he stiffens in his luxurious leather chair. “Why would you do that to Axel?”

  He releases a slow breath. “So you’ve talked to him. Okay. Sit down, Kendra,” he says, waving me toward the couch across from him.

  I’m not going to sit down. I won’t be docile and obey what he says. I just cross my arms and glare at him. “I’m comfortable where I am, thanks. I want you to answer my question.”

  “You’re really angry with me,” he says, his eyes widening in surprise. He looks genuinely taken aback. “Honey, I’m just trying to protect you. Axel could never work out in the long term for you.”

  “So…you decided the best strategy was to lie to me and make me think you were going to help him—”

  “I never said I would help him,” he interrupts.

  “Don’t do that,” I say. “Don’t act like you didn’t deceive me. I’m sick of your snobbery. Sick of the way you’ve treated him. You taught me different than this—that we aren’t supposed to view our family wealth as making us better than anyone else.”

  He grinds his teeth. “You’re twisting things now.”

  “No, you are. And I’m fed up with it. With the way you’re trying to run my life. I’m disappointed in you,” I say flatly. Then I turn toward the door.

  “Everything I am doing is to protect you,” my father says to my back. “It’s because I love you. People like Axel, they are going to hurt you if you let them. He might be a nice guy, sure, but he isn’t made for serious relationships. He’s just going to break your heart. You have my word on that, Kendra.”

  I pause with my hand on the doorknob.

  “Unfortunately, Daddy, your word doesn’t mean as much as it used to.”

  I leave the room, clicking the door behind me. My body feels tired suddenly, like I could sleep for a week. So I stretch out in bed, my brain unable to shut down despite my desire for rest.

  I can’t help but worry about Axel. Ache for him, for the pain I know he’s feeling about this. The look on his face when he was telling me what my father did… And sadly, I did this to him, even though it was unwillingly, unknowingly. I brought him what I thought was a solid opportunity, and then my father ripped the rug out from under us both and insulted him.

  My stomach churns, and I press a hand to my belly, flipping onto my side. If I’d known my dad was going to be so cruel in his dealings with Axel, I never would have brought the idea to him.

  I held my dad on such a high pedestal. Basically worshiped him. Eagerly learned about the business, emulated him for years and years. Tried to make him proud in all my ventures, both academic and personal.

  And in the end, I don’t really know him at all. In the end, he’s just another fallible human being. Subject to his own prejudices, his own biases. Willing to manipulate people just to get what he thinks is best. No better than anyone else. Certainly no better than the people he claims he’s trying to protect me from.

  My heart gives a painful throb, and I realize I’m crying, hot tears sliding down my cheek and onto the pillowcase. Something has changed in me today, some piece of myself broken apart and crumbled into dust. And I can never get it back. That naïve faith I used to have in my father, it’s gone.

  I kick off my shoes and slide under my blanket. If I close my eyes, I can remember the feel of Axel lying beside me. I’ve only known him for a few weeks, but in that time, he’s come to mean a lot to me. The
thought of him hurting makes my own heart hurt.

  I’ll find him tomorrow. We’ll talk about it. This shit with my dad was messed up, but the business plan is still solid. We can look at approaching banks, or maybe other people I’ve come to know since working for my father. Lots of wealthy people who like investing in up-and-coming local business. I should know—Daddy’s had me schmoozing them.

  Feeling a bit rallied, I wipe the last of my tears and feel my heart lighten in its sorrow, just a bit. This can be fixed. We’ll just have to try other avenues, is all. My eyes are growing heavy, so I give in and let sleep carry me away.

  I’m nervous as I step into the shower the next morning, stomach twisting over itself. I haven’t heard from Axel at all, which isn’t like him. Is he mad at me because I was the one who set up the connection with him and my father? Surely he knows that I had the wool pulled over my eyes too, not just him.

  I lather up my hair and rinse, shave until my body feels smooth. Take my time putting on lotion, sliding into my dress, doing my hair and makeup. I will be collected and sensible when I see Axel, not emotional or irrational. I don’t know what’s going on with him, and I don’t want to make assumptions.

  Hopefully he’ll be open to hearing me out on us presenting his business plan to others. But if not, I won’t force it. He has a right to make up his own mind and do things at his pace. I’ll support his autonomy in a way my father clearly hasn’t given to me.

  The thought of my dad sours my mood. I leave the house without going down to breakfast and risk seeing him—I’ll grab coffee and a Danish on my way.

  I stop at a gas station and get what I want, then drive to Axel’s house. The whole time, I’m trying to not let my nerves get the better of me. He and I will be okay, and we’ll get through this.